As a writer I know we must have titles that get readers interested but here I think you went too far. Most of the article is fine, but this is a bit too much speculation and clickbait.

While you got me to click once, now you make me not want to go back and read anything else you wrote. Keep in mind your own reputation.

Edit: I realize this was a joke, but not sure this joke landed that well. Ok, I'll give your next article a try ;-)