Erik Engheim
3 min readApr 16, 2022

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I don't blame you for being angry with white people. I have followed American society for a long time and seen how racism manifests itself. I still remember very well visiting the US for the first time 27 years ago. They took us to a fancy New York restaurant. At it I remember a big black guy in a fancy uniform at the bathroom turning on the tap water and handing me a towel. He was there to get a tip. I was just 17 at the time but I could still see how deeply unfair the whole thing was. I was bewildered and angry at the same time. Had slavery not ended in America in 1865 I wondered. Did they not see how much this looked like the old American race based class society of old? I stood there as a member of the privileged class while he waited for a tip. I never asked for him nor myself to play these roles.

That was probably my first direct encounter with a black person. Over the years I have seen how American police have shot black people. Beaten them up. I have had countless interactions with white Americans who don't want to admit the inherent unfairness of American society. The institutionalization of racism. You have gone through a lot.

But I ask you to also reflect upon whether that experience necessarily gives a clarity of mind. Hate can cloud the mind and judgement. Because you have seen so many white people wronged you, you start seeing every white person as a culprit and accomplice. I have seen this in my own country, Norway.

The Nazi occupation during WW2 left a lot of Norwegians with a strong aversion, prejudice and sometimes straight of hatred of anyone German. Kids with German fathers suffered a lot growing up in post-war Norway. Many justified their hatred of all Germans based on how they or their family had suffered at the hands of the Nazi regime. When you have not lived through it yourself it is hard to judge these people.

I have not had your experiences, so I cannot judge you for your anger. Yet I can implore you to reflect on the fact that precisely because of your experiences you may not be the most objective judge in all matters. Love as well as hate can cloud your judgement.

It is clear in how you read my reponse. You are looking for and seeing things which are not there. You think I try to blame you for the existence of white supremacists. Of course not. That are themselves to blame. I am simply pointing out that many of the people focusing on villifying all white people run the errand of white supremacists.

White people is not not a homogenous group of people, obviously. There are people on the fence close in opinon to the alt-right crowd but not quite there yet. Others are fiercly anti-racist. Generalization of white people probably doesn't bother the latter crowd. But there are those who get tired of the accusations. People whos hearts will harden with anger and hatred. Maybe they have not had the best experiences in life. Constantly being made into villains. They may not join the alt-right, but they may also not stand in their way.

You know when the Nazis took power in Germany it happened just as much because of those who really believed in it as because of those who felt no obligation to stand in their way.

Not that I think anything like that will happen in the US. But by fueling divisions America will keep electing people like Donald Trump.

I think it is more fruitful to convince white people that they can also be part of the solution rather than always treating them as the enemy. Your choice. Ideally we whould group people by whether they are part of the solution or contributors to the problem rathern than reinforcing divisions between people based on skin color.

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Erik Engheim
Erik Engheim

Written by Erik Engheim

Geek dad, living in Oslo, Norway with passion for UX, Julia programming, science, teaching, reading and writing.

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